The more detailed explanation from the reel — the “What are you doing right now?” test, more examples for every verb, the cases the test gets wrong, a cheat sheet, and ten questions to test yourself.
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Both mean “in” or “at” in English — so English can't tell you which one to use. Japanese decides with one question about the verb, and one picture makes it stick.
If you have ever said 東京で住んでる (“I live in Tokyo”), you are in good company. By the end of this page you will know why it's wrong — and how to pick the right particle in a second.
By @ruto_japanese · NOVAS
These are the four sentences from the reel. In English the little word never changes. In Japanese it flips — and nothing about the place changed.
東京に住んでる。
I live in Tokyo.
東京で働いてる。
I work in Tokyo.
家にいる。
I'm at home.
家でごはんを食べる。
I eat at home.
English · looks at the place
Tokyo is a city, so it's “in.” Swap the verb for any other and it stays “in.”
Japanese · looks at the verb
The verb at the end reaches back and picks the particle: 住んでる (live) takes に, 働いてる (work) takes で.
That's why English can't help you here. English picks “in” or “at” by the place; Japanese picks に or で by the verb. Tokyo, your home, a café — any place can take either one.
Forget “in” and “at.” Picture one of these instead — every に and で on this page is one or the other.
One point. Where something is.
猫はソファにいる。The cat is on the sofa.
Where an action happens.
猫はソファで寝てる。The cat is sleeping on the sofa.
A pin doesn't do anything. It marks one spot — where a person, a cat, your phone or your home is — and that's all. That's に.
A stage is where things happen. Eating, working, waiting, even sleeping: whenever someone is doing something, the place they do it is a stage. That's で.
The test
Is the verb an action? Ask yourself:
If you can answer with the verb, it's an action, so the place is a stage: で. If you can't, the verb is about being somewhere — a pin: に.
* This works in most cases. The few it gets wrong are further down.
Part 1 · に — the pin
いる and ある both mean “to be” — as in “to be somewhere.” いる is for people and animals, ある for things. Neither one describes anything happening: someone or something is just there. So the place gets a pin.
This is the に you'll use most. Whenever you ask or say where something is, it's に.
Examples
A今どこにいる？
B渋谷にいる。
“Where are you now?” “In Shibuya.”
財布、かばんの中にあるよ。
Your wallet's in your bag.
トイレは2階にあります。Polite
The restroom is on the second floor.
This is the classic mix-up. In English, “live” feels like something you do, so learners reach for で. In Japanese, 住む (to live) doesn't describe any activity. It says where your home is — a pin on the map.
So it takes に, just like いる (to be). You live in Tokyo while you're asleep, while you're at work, even while you're on holiday in Okinawa. Nothing is happening; it's just true.
close東京で住んでる。“I live in Tokyo” — wrong particle
check東京に住んでる。I live in Tokyo.
Examples
Aどこに住んでるの？
B京都に住んでる。
“Where do you live?” “In Kyoto.”
兄は今、ロンドンに住んでる。
My brother lives in London now.
両親は福岡に住んでいます。Polite
My parents live in Fukuoka.
Here is one ordinary day. Your pin never moves: you live in Tokyo the whole time. What changes is what you're doing — and every one of those is a で sentence.
Part 2 · で — the stage
Eating is the easy one: you can see it happening. The table, the restaurant, the park bench — wherever it happens is the stage, and the stage gets で.
The same goes for nearly every verb in your day: 飲む (drink), 買う (buy), 見る (watch). If someone is doing something, it's で.
Examples
今日のお昼、どこで食べる？
Where should we eat lunch today?
コンビニでお茶買った。
I bought tea at the convenience store.
駅前のカフェでコーヒーを飲みました。Polite
I had a coffee at the café in front of the station.
Studying and working are things you do, for hours at a time, somewhere. The library, the office, the café where you study on Sundays — each one is a stage.
This is where the reel's pair comes from: 東京に住んでる (“I live in Tokyo”), 東京で働いてる (“I work in Tokyo”). Same city, two particles — living is a pin, working is a stage.
Examples
図書館で勉強してる。
I'm studying at the library.
姉は病院で働いてる。
My sister works at a hospital.
週末は家で日本語を勉強しています。Polite
On weekends I study Japanese at home.
Waiting doesn't look like much. You're standing still, maybe looking at your phone. But try the test: “What are you doing right now?” — “I'm waiting” (待ってる). That's a real answer, so it's something you're doing, and the spot where you wait is a stage.
Examples
入口で待ってるね。
I'll wait for you at the entrance.
バス停で30分待った。
I waited thirty minutes at the bus stop.
こちらでお待ちください。Polite
Please wait here. — you'll hear this in shops, clinics and hotels.
This is the one that surprises people. Sleeping feels like the opposite of doing something — you're lying there with your eyes closed. But ask “What are you doing right now?” about someone asleep, and the answer is “I'm sleeping” (寝てる).
So sleeping is something that happens, and where it happens is a stage: 家で寝る, “I sleep at home.”
Examples
昨日、友達の家で寝ちゃった。
I fell asleep at a friend's place last night.
夏はリビングで寝てる。
In summer I sleep in the living room.
子供たちはもう部屋で寝ています。Polite
The kids are already asleep in their room.
The reel said the test works in most cases. These are the ones it gets wrong — and the pin or the stage still explains every one.
Staying the night
ホテルに泊まる。
I'll stay at a hotel.
“I'm staying at a hotel” sounds like an answer, but 泊まる (stay the night) works like 住む (live), just for a night: it says where you are, not what you're doing. Pin.
Going somewhere
日本に行きたい！
I want to go to Japan!
“I'm going to Japan” answers the question, but with 行く (go), 来る (come) and 帰る (go home), に marks where you end up — the pin at the end of the trip. Pin.
Sitting down
椅子に座ってください。
Please sit on the chair.
“I'm sitting” answers the question, but here に marks the exact spot you land on — the seat itself. Pin.
Being born
東京で生まれた。
I was born in Tokyo.
Nobody is “being born” right now, so the test says に. But a birth is something that happened, once, somewhere — an event. Stage.
Say the whole sentence out loud before you open the answer. The first four are the ones from the reel; the rest are new — one comes from the “most cases” section, and one uses a verb this page never taught.
I studied at a café. From the reel
カフェ勉強した。
で — studying is something you do. Stage.
My mom is at home. From the reel
お母さんは家いる。
に — いる (to be) only says where she is. Pin.
My friend lives in Osaka. From the reel
友達は大阪住んでる。
に — nobody answers “What are you doing right now?” with “living in Osaka.” 住む (live) is being, not doing. Pin.
I'm waiting at the station. From the reel
駅待ってる。
で — 待ってる (“waiting”) answers “What are you doing right now?” Stage.
I'm going to Hokkaido next month.
来月、北海道行く。
に — one from “in most cases”: with 行く (go), に marks where you end up. Pin.
I fell asleep on the train.
電車の中寝ちゃった。
で — sleeping counts. Stage.
Is there a bank around here?
この辺銀行ある？
に — ある (to be, for things) asks where something is. Pin.
Where did you buy that?
それ、どこ買ったの？
で — buying happened somewhere; the question asks for that stage.
Let's hang out at the park!
公園遊ぼう！
で — 遊ぶ (play, hang out) wasn't on this page, but “I'm hanging out” answers “What are you doing right now?” — so it's a stage. That's the picture doing its job.
I live in Tokyo and work in Yokohama.
東京住んでて、横浜働いてる。
に, then で — one sentence, a pin and a stage. Tokyo is where you are; Yokohama is where the work happens.
Screenshot this one.
Being — where something is
Verbs
The test
“What are you doing right now?” — you can't answer with the verb
Example
家にいる。I'm at home.
Action — where something happens
Verbs
The test
“What are you doing right now?” — you can answer with the verb
Example
家で食べる。I eat at home.
visibilityLook at the verb, not the place. Any place can take either particle.
close東京で住んでる → 東京に住んでる (“I live in Tokyo”) — living is a pin.
bedtimeWaiting and sleeping count as doing. 駅で待つ · 家で寝る (wait at the station · sleep at home)
priority_highWhere the test is wrong: ホテルに泊まる (stay at a hotel) · 日本に行く (go to Japan) · 椅子に座る (sit on a chair) · 東京で生まれた (I was born in Tokyo)
And the test under all of it: “What are you doing right now?” Can you answer with the verb? Yes — で. No — に. In most cases.
The usual way to learn this is a rule and two lists: に with these verbs, で with those. That works on a test, where you have time to think. In a conversation, the particle comes out before you've had time to check anything.
A picture is faster. See a pin or a stage, and the particle is already there — even for a verb you learned five minutes ago.
That's how NOVAS teaches particles: a picture for each one, built for speaking at real speed.